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Never Smile at a Crocodile April 12, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Weird News.
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And don’t offer to give one a hand either, or could this happen:-

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Surgeons reattached a Taiwanese veterinarian’s forearm today after a 200-kilogram Nile crocodile chomped it off and colleagues recovered the limb from the reptile’s mouth.

The male crocodile severed Chang Po-yu’s forearm at the Shaoshan Zoo in the southern city of Kaohsiung yesterday when the veterinarian tried to retrieve a tranquiliser dart from the reptile’s hide so he could give it medication, zoo officials said.

The forearm was reattached following seven hours of surgery today.

The Liberty Times newspaper said Chang failed to notice that the crocodile was not fully anaesthetised when he stuck his arm through an iron rail to medicate it.

As Chang was rushed to the hospital yesterday, a zoo worker shot two bullets at the crocodile’s neck to retrieve the forearm, Chen Po-tsun, a zoo official, said.

“The crocodile was unharmed as we didn’t find any bullet holes on its hide,” Chen said. “It probably was shocked and opened its mouth to let go of the limb.”

The 17-year-old reptile is one of a pair of Nile crocodiles kept by the zoo.

Known as a man-eater because of its voracious nature, the crocodile is listed as an endangered species, and is rapidly disappearing from its native African habitat.

Chen said the zoo bought the crocodile 10 years ago from a local resident who had kept it as a pet.

Dear Diary April 7, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Say it aint so.
1 comment so far

The juggernaut that is Anna Nicole Smith just gathers more steam. I’ve been asking myself for a while now when it will stop, now I’m not sure it ever will.

Access Hollywood (of course I keep in touch – its my homepage) reports that excerpts of her diary (which is up for auction) were made public, and now I’m left questioning everything I thought I knew. There I was thinking I was enjoying a productive and happy life, until I read how A.N.S. got through the day. Man! Talk about excitement city.

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WOW! How about that for an action packed existence. Imagine if there were pages and pages of this stuff? C’mon Hollywood, make the movie already!!!

What else does A.N.S. have to say?

“Howard has been buying me some jewrlry (sic),” Smith writes in a page made public. “He call me 15 or 20 times a day it drives me crazy. I love him but he aggravates me sometimes.”

Yeah well bad spelling aside you have to feel for the Texas high school dropout who became a topless dancer and married 89-year-old billionaire.

“I hate for men to want sex all the time,” she wrote. “I hate sex anyway. I only like it with Clay now that he’s out of my life.”

You got that right girlfriend! Apparently, the diaries also reveal she was often depressed and had an eating disorder. Can’t see why of course. Then again if she had any actual FOOD in her fridge she may have HAD something to eat. Something other than the chloral hydrate, valium, carisoprodol, methocarbamol, topomax and Klonopin prescriptions all found in her home.

Don’t Make Her Mad Because……. April 5, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Funny Pics.
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….just don’t make her mad, okay? You’ve been warned!

Criminal (not so) Masterminds April 2, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Stoopid with a Capital St.
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Today’s crime doesn’t pay story (it doesn’t even cover expenses for this band of dimwits) comes to us from sunny Melbourne. Note for the non local WWWers amongst us, Melbourne, Australia; the pretty place that it is, is about as about as sunny as George W. Bush is articulate – you get the point I’m sure.

A bungling armed robber shot his female accomplice as they held up a restaurant in the Dandenong Ranges east of Melbourne overnight.

Shock! Horror! Gasp! Look, I never got around to watching enough Law and Order or CSI, but I do know one should ensure the planning and executing stages of a daring robbery need more than these guys came up with.

Was it well planned? You bet.

The couple waited until after the last customers had left the Cuckoo restaurant, in Olinda, before confronting a staff member by his car in the restaurant’s car park .

The pair demanded the staff member hand over a black plastic bag, which it is thought they believed contained the restaurant’s takings.

So aptly targeted, the Cuckoo resturant. Now you are probably wondering where did things started to go pair-shaped?

However, the bag actually held left-over bread rolls, which the staff member was planning to feed to his chickens.

The money is safe but someone’s chooks will NOT be pleased.

Restaurant General Manager Horst Lantzsch said the bandits then demanded the staff member’s car keys.

He said as the staff member handed over the car keys, the shotgun discharged, wounding the woman in the stomach.

Lets see; that’s a fail on planning AND execution. I wonder how long before camera phone footage of the (so called) robbery is posted on Youtube?

“She got injured very heavily, and she fell to the ground in the middle of the street in Olinda main road,” Mr Lantzsch said.

Yeah, I suspect being hit at point blank range by a shotgun will do that for you.

“She dropped to the ground like a sack of potatoes.”

With the benefit of hindsight this gang would have been better off stealing potatoes; at least then Larry, Moe and Curly would have had something to eat.

Mr Lantzsch said he and his staff member then ran inside the restaurant and locked the doors.

Mr Lantzsch said no staff were injured, no money taken and no damage was caused in the attempted robbery.

“It was frightening, everybody was a bit in shock,” he said.

Not as much shock as the woman with the shotgun wound I’ll wager.

The injured woman took herself to the William Angliss Hospital before being transferred to The Alfred Hospital in Melbourne with serious injuries.

A 37-year-old Brooklyn man was arrested shortly after 5am and was being questioned by detectives, Victoria Police spokesman Senior Constable David Fitzgerald said.

Ah yes, the timeless “assisting the police with their enquiries”. Never a good sign that.

You Know it’s Hot When….. March 30, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Funny Pics.
2 comments

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You Know You’re About To find Trouble…. March 30, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Stoopid with a Capital St.
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….when the headline uses the words saw-mill, penis, and incident!

Of course Cap Slog is skeptical until the story is confirmed, I mean exactly how one goes about getting one’s groin caught in machinery defies imagination.

But if true, this guy can share with Stanley Staplegun who tried to nail his nuts to the roof. What is going on? Any more of this and we can start thinking about opening a “Crown Jewels” ward at the local hospital.

Huh? March 23, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Funny Pics.
3 comments

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F-22A Raptor Stealthfighter Mk II March 22, 2007

Posted by worldwideweird in Funny Pics, Say it aint so.
2 comments

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As I see it – the only problem with the new model is the amount of time it will take looking for where you refuel this sucker.